The following are two articles with regards to the word terminate I published on my Chinese blog on August 13 and August 15 2009. Now I am moving them here to this English blog.
determination = de + terminate + creation = deliberately terminate myself as this systematic creation
The whole as creation is not honourable. It has to stop. This world is the reflection of me as my nature/beingness as what i have accepted and allowed myself to be and become. Thus i am not honourable. I have to stop myself and the world as creation as me. It can not continue. The Existence as me is the reflection of me as a mind consciousness system charging and powering this whole onsciousness systematic reality. The Existence as me is not reflecting who i really am as Life as all as one as equal. This world is a fuck-up because i am a fuck-up. And i did not realize how fucked i am. I pretended that i am good and the world is OK. I pretented that i am doing something and that i am standing up while allowing self-dishonesty to continue. I deliberately ignored the real situation in this world - what others are experiencing physically. I deliberately to exist in my own ignorance, pretending that the suffering in this reality does not exist. I deliberately fucked myself by existing in deliberate ignorance and inconsideration of what is really going on in this world. I spoke empty words that i am all and i am equal while not taking into consideration what others as me is really experiencing physically. If i am all, can i accept the world as it is? Am i willing to exchange situation with othe beings in this world? If not, what am i doing? Am i physically doing something to make a difference or am i still supporting the current situation to continue because i do not want to lose my own self-definition which is not even real? Fuckers denying his own fuckedness is how this fucked-up world is fucked. First step is to realize how fucked i am with absoulte honesty. If i can not see how fucked i am and still pretend that i am OK and this world is OK, i am self-dishonest. Then to terminate myself as a fuck-up and this fucked-up world as me. Terminate myself as a mind consciousness system and terminate the creation as a mind consiousness systematic reality as me. I am the terminator of myself as a mind consciousness system and the world as creation as the systematic reality. I am determination = I deliberately terminate myself as this systematic creation. I deliberately terminate myself as a MCS because i have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately become a fucker/deceiver.
I terminate myself because i am not real. Then I give myself the opportunity to birth my real self as Life as all as one as equal.
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Self-forgiveness
Why applying self-forgiveness? For giving self back to self. Because self has become an illusion through self's own acceptance and allowance. Thus self needs to forgive self for what self has accepted and allowed self to become that which is not who self really is as Life as all as one as equal, in order to 'return' to the innocence of who self really is. Self-forgiveness statement "I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself..." is the statement that this is not who i really am but what i have accepted and allowed myself to become which is not real, and i take responsibility to stop such an illusion that i have accepted and allowed myself to become. Self-forgiveness is the self-termination of the illusionary self that self has accepted and allowed self to become.
Then a question arises: if i am not this, who am i really?
Self-statement is a direct statement of who i really am. Who i really am is the living word as the sound harmonic expression of Life as Life as all as one as equal every here moment as breath of Life.Thus self discern/distinguish what is acceptable and what is not acceptable
Yet it is not to separate self from anything. Even those that self is not is through self's own acceptance and allowance, thus it is self's own responsibility to stop it as self and self must stand Here one and equal with all and everything that self has accepted and allowed self to become to be able to direct self effectively.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOLkHWp7CBc&feature=PlayList&p=4085F5DD19D2E78D&index=4
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