Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Stopping Knife-Phobia in Desteni I Process

About two years ago, I started to have a peculiar fear - fear of knives. I know I created it because I did not have such a fear before - it is a reactive pattern that is developped. When I saw a knife, some pictures of harm/kill etc would come up into my mind and almost immediately I went into fear and had a physical reaction such as putting my arm in front of my chest to sort of protect myself. It bothered me quite a lot because every time I saw a kinfe this pattern would come up. But at that time I did not have specific and effective tools to stop this pattern. From my understanding at that time, it seemed to be some form of mental disease. So I looked up on the web to search for related information about such fears and did find some relevant information. It is described that patients suffering from this kind of disease would have those pictures or thoughts coming up into their minds which they can not direct/control. Some of those pictures/thoughts might be very weird - for example, a mother having pictures suddenly coming up into her mind of throwing the child in her arms into river - something like that. The patients do not know how to stop those pictures which has become a habitual behavior and feared that they might actually act upon those thoughts/pictures. And we do not have effective treatment for this kind of mental disease.

I went through that experience so I know that kind of suffering - It's like fighting a battle that I can never win because I do not understand what I am dealing with. It's not a disease that can be treated with some physical medication. It mostly depend on the patients to overcome their insanity of the mind and the fears that the mind generate. Our current science do not Actually know much about how the mind works - let alone to say understanding the mind on a specific level and have specific treatments for specific mental diseases. I mean, in order to treat a disease effectively we have to understand how it is developped - the cause of it.

In my particular case, the start of this pattern of knife-phobia can be traced back to a night more than two years ago. At that time I was not very stable because I was still in the beginning of my process and could not find my feet. That night I was haunted by a memory. The memory is as follows: "My family was watching a TV program one night some years ago. It was about an event of robbery or stealing where someone got into the house and was found by the host. The host fought with the person using a kitchen knife and chopped towards the person’s head several times and the knife just got bounced back. My father said if he were in that situation he would chop towards the person’s neck. I reacted into fear imagining within my mind this whole scenario if the kitchen knife were chopped at my head or neck."  -- This particular picture of kitchen kinfes chopping at my head and neck played out within my mind over and over and over again and I reacted in fear. The picture just seemed unstoppable - I was literally possessed by it. And I did not know how to stop it. Each time it played out in my mind, I went into fear and that pattern intensified each time. It became an unresolved issue that I did not know what to do about it. And then when I saw a knife or the picture of a kinfe in my life somewhere, that particular picture of knives chopping at me would come up into my mind and I went into that pattern reaction of fear which gradually became a habitual pattern. Each time I saw a kinfe, this pattern built onto itself one more layer based on that experience - so it became a multiple-layered habitual pattern. Then the strange thing is that I started to identify myself as such pattern - believing it to be unchangible and that would just be how I behave in relation to knife.

So from investigating this pattern, I see how this whole construct of kinfe-phobia is created through my acceptance/allowance/participation in the repetition of a singular memory/picture which was not dealt with immdediatelly and effectively - gradually built onto itself multiple layers each time it repeats and became a habitual pattern that seemed to be unchangable. I created this pattern through my acceptance and allowance and participation in my mind - allowing a memory/picture to direct me, allowing fear to control me. Thus I as the creator is responsible for such a creation which is a suffering experience that requires to be stopped. And the key to stop is self-forgiveness - specific self-forgiveness within self-honest starting point of investigation of the self-created pattern. This month's subject of the course Introduction to Desteni is about the fear system. It's a perfect opportunity for me to apply the tools that I have learned from the course so far and to actually apply them on this point of knife-phobia which has bothered me for so long -- I mean to really practically solve a problem in my life that I previously felt helpless to deal with - that is something, isn't it? I know this pattern I have existed in for so long is not just going to disappear in one night. I still require to walk the correction and stop the insane fear that has caused me so much suffering, but I no longer feel helpless to deal with it because I have the effective tools to work on it.


Below I attached my assignment of this month for the ITD course of the Desteni I Process - (not the complete document, but sufficient for understanding how I worked it through).


Check out the following websites:

Desteni I Process: http://desteniiprocess.com/
Desteni website: http://www.desteni.co.za/
Equal Money System: http://www.equalmoney.org/
My Youtube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/WeiWuHere?feature=mhum
My Chinese Blog: http://blog.sina.com.cn/qiudaozhe
 
By the way, I am a DIP agent. If you like what I do, you can work with me in the DIP.
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1. Laying-out the Thought-Construct




1.1 Identify the thoughts of fear that came up in your writing:

I have to be careful so that the knife does not cut my finger.



1.2 Other Components



1.2.1 Emotion: Fear

Other emotions: Anxiety

Feelings:



1.2.2 Words: knife



1.2.3 Pictures: A Japanese solider use his bayonet on his gun to stab a baby.



1.2.4 Memories:

My father talked about a news about physical harm.



2. The Thoughts Work-Sheet

2.1 Trigger point of the thought:

Seeing the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife

2.2 Type of thought: Fear – specify what type of fear:

Fear of knives/Pain (Death) – (It is more of the fear of pain in being physically harmed with knives rather than death)



2.3 Self-Forgiveness



2.3.1 Self-Forgiveness on the thought:



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the thought that I have to be careful so that the knife does not cut my finger.



2.3.2 Self-Forgiveness on the trigger point of the thought:



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect seeing the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife to the thought that I have to be careful so that the knife does not cut my finger.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing seeing the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife to exist as a trigger point within me – triggering the thought that I have to be careful so that the knife does not cut my finger.



2.3.3 Self-Forgiveness on the type of thought:



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my finger being cut by the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect “my finger being cut by the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife” to fear - and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the pain of my finger being cut by the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect “the pain of my finger being cut by the sharp blade of the Swiss Army Knife” to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being killed with a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect being killed with a knife to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the pain of being killed with a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the pain of being killed with a knife to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being stabbed by a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect being stabbed by a knife to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the pain when a knife is stabbed into my body.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the pain when a knife is stabbed into my body to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear physical harm.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect physical harm to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear dying in agonizing pain.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect dying in agonizing pain to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I am not able to handle the fear of being harmed with a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect “not being able to handle the fear of being harmed with a knife” to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of being cut by a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of the pain of being cut by a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of being killed by a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of physical harm.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of dying in agonizing pain.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the fear of not being able to handle the fear of being harmed with a knife.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear death.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect death to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my own fear.





I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that fear is real.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to question my own fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the fear of knives over and over and over again, creating and manifesting the fear system within me and within my world.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I am the creator of this fear that I am experiencing.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide from the fear of being harmed by a knife instead of realizing that hiding from this fear is hiding from myself because I am the creator of this fear and thus I am responsible for this fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear myself.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that fear is simply a pre-programmed reaction.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to and as the pre-programmed reaction as fear and believe it to be who I am.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give my power away to fear – within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to enslave myself to fear and become powerless in stopping fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abdicate self-responsibility – the responsibility towards the pattern of fear of knives that I have created by myself as myself through my participation in it over and over and over again.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from fear, instead of taking self-responsibility to stand equal and one with/as it and stand up from within it and stop it.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that the purpose of fear is to keep me from realizing myself as who I am as Life, one and equal.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize the ineffectiveness, irrelevance, impracticality of fear.





I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to perceive and believe that if I am more careful it is more likely I will not be cut by the knife, instead of realizing that ‘having to be careful’ is done from the starting point of fear and thus creating and manifesting fear.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that when I am obsessed with being careful to not cut myself, I am not completely here equal and one with what I am doing with the knife and thus I might create the experience of being cut because of the obsession with the thought of being careful to not cut myself.



2.4 Self-Corrective Statements:



I accept and realize that fear is useless, ineffective and irrelevant – fear is not going to protect me and that fear is not going to help me – it merely makes me suffer as I exist in continuous fear.



I accept and realize that fear of being harmed by knives is not going to prevent me from being harmed by knives.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate in the useless, ineffective, irrelevant, suffer-causing fear of being harmed by knives.



I do not accept and allow myself to suffer through existing in constant and continuous fear of being harmed by knives.





I accept and realize that fear of being harmed by knives actually manifests the experience of/as the fear of being harmed by knives because I am the creator of such an experience through my accepted and allowed nature as such a fear.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate in constant and continuous fear of being harmed by knives.



I do not accept and allow myself to manifest and create my experience of being harmed by knives.



I do not accept and allow myself to continue to exist as the accepted and allowed nature of/as fear of being harmed by knives.



I stop creating my experience of being physically harmed by knives.





I accept and realize that fear is not real – it is a pre-programmed reaction of my mind that I have believed and defined as who I am and that its purpose is to keep me from realizing myself as who I am as Life, one and equal.



I do not accept and allow myself to believe that fear is real.



I do not accept and allow myself to define myself according to and as a pre-programmed reaction of my mind as fear.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate in fear.



I do not accept and allow myself to enslave myself through participating in fear and believing myself to be the reaction of/as fear.



I accept and allow myself to live who I am as LIFE, one and equal – free from the control and enslavement of/as fear.





I accept and realize that fear exists through my participation and I am the creator of fear that exist within me and thus I am responsible for what I have accepted and allowed to create, manifest and define myself as which is fear – I am not separate from fear.



I do not accept and allow myself to abdicate my creation of or separate myself from fear.



I accept and allow myself to take self-responsibility as creator to stand equal and one with/as it and stand up from within it and stop participating in it.





I accept and realize that ‘having to be careful’ is done from the starting point of fear and thus creating and manifesting fear and that when I am obsessed with being careful to not cut myself - I am not completely here equal and one with what I am doing with the knife and thus I might create the experience of being cut because of the obsession with the thought of having to be careful to not cut myself.



I do not accept and allow myself to be obsessed with the thought of having to be careful so that I do not cut myself.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate from the starting point of fear i.e. constantly and continuously reminding myself of having to be careful to not be cut by the knife.



I accept and allow myself to be completely here equal and one with what I am doing with the knife and use Common Sense to direct me.





The meaning of my Chinese name is literally No Fear. I accept and allow myself to live my name as No Fear – becoming the living word as No Fear.



Re-scripture of the practical solution for the trigger point:



Whenever I see a knife, I stop and breathe, I do not accept and allow myself to go into or participate in the reaction of/as fear. I stop and breathe. I do not accept and allow myself to participate in pictures within my mind related to fear. If pictures do come up, I stop and breathe and do not accept and allow myself to participate in them in any way whatsoever. I establish myself Here in the physical equal and one with/as the knife and the task that I am using the knife with and direct myself with common sense. I take self-responsibility for the pattern of fear of knives that I have created and stand up within it and stop myself as it. When I find myself going into stiffness and petrification in such a situation, I stop and breathe and just laugh to assist and support myself to break the hold of the fear – simply laughing at myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in such a useless fear.





3. The Emotion or Feeling Work-Sheet



Emotion/Feeling 1

3.1 Specific type/’shade’ of emotion/feeling:

Fear of pain



3.2 Reason for connecting thought to emotion/feeling:

I see knives as dangerous and able to harm me physically. I feared the pain of being harmed physically by knives.



3.3 Self-Forgiveness



3.3.1 Self-Forgiveness on connecting thought with emotion/feeling:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought of me having to be careful to not cut myself to an emotion experience of fear.



3.3.2 Self-Forgiveness on emotion/feeling:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the emotion of fear of being harmed by knives and the pain thereof.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the emotion of fear of being harmed by knives and the pain thereof because I have defined knives as dangerous and able to harm me physically.



Self-Forgiveness on the reason for Connection:



The SF on fear has been applied in the thought-construct worksheet. The point of defining knives as dangerous will be dealt with in the word web.



3.4 Self-Corrective Statement



I accept and realize that the emotion of fear does not support me in any way whatsoever and is useless, irrelevant, and impractical.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate in the useless, irrelevant, and impractical emotion of fear.





Emotion/Feeling 2

3.5 Specific type/’shade’ of emotion/feeling:

3.6 Anxiety



3.7 Reason for connecting thought to emotion/feeling:

fear of the possibility of me being harmed physically by knives



3.8 Self-Forgiveness



3.8.1 Self-Forgiveness on connecting thought with emotion/feeling:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought of me having to be careful to not cut myself to an emotion experience of anxiety.



3.8.2 Self-Forgiveness on emotion/feeling:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the emotion of anxiety.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the emotional experience of anxiety in my solar plexus.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as the anxiety that I experienced in my solar plexus.



Self-Forgiveness on the reason for Connection:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the emotion of anxiety because of the fear of the possibility of being harmed physically by knives.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the possibility of me being harmed physically by knives.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the possibility of me being harmed physically by knives to fear – and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my fear.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be worried and concerned with something that might possibly happen, instead of realizing that such worry, concern, anxiety does not assist and support me in any way whatsoever – they cannot prevent events from happening but actually create and manifest that which I worry and concern.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the experience of uncertainty of what might possibly happen.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as the uncertainty of what might possibly happen.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be obsessed with the uncertainty of what might possibly happen, instead of realizing that it is as useless, irrelevant and impractical as worry, concern, anxiety, and fear.



3.9 Self-Corrective Statement



I accept and realize that the emotion of anxiety, worry, concern, uncertainty does not support me in any way whatsoever and is useless, irrelevant, and impractical.



I do not accept and allow myself to participate in the useless, irrelevant, and impractical emotion of anxiety, worry, concern, uncertainty.



When I find myself going into such emotional experiences as anxiety, worry, concern, uncertainty – I stop and breathe through these experiences until they exist no more within me.



4. The Words Work-Sheet



4.1 Word-Web:



Knife: Murder/ Killing, Blood, Death, Weapon, Danger, Harm, Cut, Chop, behead, pain, skinning

4.2 Self-Forgiveness

4.2.1 Self-Forgiveness on positive/negative value for word:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to charge the word knife with a negative value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge the word knife as bad/wrong/negative within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife through judging the word knife as bad/wrong/negative.

4.2.2 Self-Forgiveness on each point in the word-web:

Danger:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word danger.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word danger.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word danger through defining the word knife within the word danger in separation of myself.



Harm:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word harm.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word harm.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word harm through defining the word knife within the word harm in separation of myself.



Suffer:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word suffer.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word suffer.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word suffer through defining the word knife within the word suffer in separation of myself.



Stab:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word stab.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word stab.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word stab through defining the word knife within the word stab in separation of myself.



Cut:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word cut.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word cut.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word cut through defining the word knife within the word cut in separation of myself.



Chop:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word chop.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word chop.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word chop through defining the word knife within the word chop in separation of myself.



Pain:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word pain.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word pain.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word pain through defining the word knife within the word pain in separation of myself.



Skinning:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word skinning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word skinning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word skinning through defining the word knife within the word skinning in separation of myself.



Behead:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word behead.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word behead.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word behead through defining the word knife within the word behead in separation of myself.



Blood:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word blood.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word blood.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word blood through defining the word knife within the word blood in separation of myself.



Murder/Killing:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the words murder/killing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the words murder/killing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the words murder/killing through defining the word knife within the words murder/killing in separation of myself.



Death:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word death.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word death.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word death through defining the word knife within the word death in separation of myself.



Weapon:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word knife to the word weapon.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word knife within the word weapon.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word knife and from the word weapon through defining the word knife within the word weapon in separation of myself.



4.3 Re-define the word in the centre-circle of the word-web:

4.3.1 Dictionary definition:

sharp blade with a handle, used for cutting or as a weapon; cutting blade in a machine or tool

4.3.2 Sounding the word:

The word knife sounds (speaking/hearing) like life. Its structure (writing/spelling) can be seen as composed of two parts: k + nife. I would define the part nife within the word knife as life according to their closeness both in hearing and spelling. The letter K can be defined as Keep or Kill – depending on the one who uses the knife.

New definition:

Knife: blade with a handle, depending on the one using the knife it can be used either to Keep Life or Kill Life – Keeping Life from the perspective that it can be used as a practical functional tool to support life; Killing Life from the perspective that it can be used as a tool to destroy life.



5. The Pictures Work-Sheet



5.1 Drawing/writing out a picture-representation:

The picture does not have any specific background. There are just two persons in it – a Japanese solider with a bayonet on his gun and a bady. The Japanese solider is on the right side while the baby is on the left top corner. The bayonet is in the baby’s body and the Japanese solider is holding up the gun and the bayonet. This motionless picture is the main frame of this scenario. Sometimes it plays out like a movie where the solider throws the baby onto the ground.



5.2 What the picture as a whole represents:

killing, murdering, violence, brutality, cruelty, atrocity, war

5.3 Self-Forgiveness

5.3.1 Self-Forgiveness on connection to the thought:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the picture of the Japanese solider stabbing a bayonet into a baby’s body to the thought that I have to be careful with the knife to not cut myself.

5.3.2 Self-Forgiveness on the picture (use the points you drew/wrote down in 6.1 to describe the picture):

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the picture in which there is a Japanese solider on the right side of the picture with a bayonet on his gun which he is holding up while the bayonet is stabbed into the baby’s body who is at the left top corner of the picture – to exist within and as me.

5.3.3 Self-Forgiveness on what the picture represents:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words ‘killing, murdering, violence, brutality, cruelty, atrocity, war’ to the picture in my mind of a Japanese solider where the Japanese solider is on the right side of the picture with a bayonet on his gun which he is holding up while the bayonet is stabbed into the baby’s body who is at the left top corner of the picture



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the words ‘killing, murdering, violence, brutality, cruelty, atrocity, war’ within a picture in my mind of a Japanese solider stabbing a bayonet into a baby’s body.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the words ‘killing, murdering, violence, brutality, cruelty, atrocity, war’ through defining these words within a picture in my mind of a Japanese solider stabbing a bayonet into a baby’s body.

5.4 Self-Corrective Statements

I realize and accept that who I am is not a picture within my mind and that it is silly to allow myself to be directed and controlled by such a picture in my mind.



I do not accept and allow myself to define myself according to a picture within my mind.



I do not accept and allow myself to be directed or controlled by a picture in my mind.



I accept and allow myself to be and live who I am here within as breath of life as awareness – not a picture in my mind.





I accept and allow myself to realize that I am not living words equal and one as who I am when words are defined within pictures in my mind is in separation from me.



I accept and allow myself to live words equal and one as who I am.



I do not accept and allow myself to define words in pictures within my mind in separation of myself.



I accept and allow myself to apply self-forgiveness in assisting and supporting myself to erase definitions of words connected to pictures/images in separation of myself.



When pictures come up into my mind irrelevant to what I am dealing with physically here – I stop and breathe and delete the picture within my mind.



6. The Memories Work-Sheet



6.1 Complete unfolding of memory:

My family was watching a TV program one night some years ago. It was about an event of robbery or stealing where someone got into the house and was found by the host. The host fought with the person using a kitchen knife and chopped towards the person’s head several times and the knife just got bounced back. My father said if he were in that situation he would chop towards the person’s neck. I reacted into fear imagining within my mind this whole scenario if the kitchen knife were chopped at my head or neck.

6.2 Relevant points within the Memory:

One night some years ago (Time)

My family (People)

Watching a TV program about a robbery or stealing (Activity)

The host chopping the kitchen knife towards the person’s head several times and the knife just got bounced back; my father saying if he were in that situation he would chop towards the person’s neck. (Event)

Fear if the kitchen knife were chopped at my head or neck (Experience)

6.3 Reason for holding on to the Memory:

I have defined myself as fear of knives/physical harm according to this memory of discussion on the news about robbery/stealing.

6.4 Self-Forgiveness

6.4.1 Self-Forgiveness on connection to the thought:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the memory of ‘my family watching a TV program about a robbery or stealing one night some years ago, where the host chopped the kitchen knife towards the person’s head several times and the knife just got bounced back while my father said if he were in that situation he would chop towards the person’s neck – I reacted into fear imagining within my mind this whole scenario if the kitchen knife were chopped at my head or neck.’ to the thought ‘I have to be careful with the knife to not cut myself’.

6.4.2 Self-Forgiveness on the memory (use the relevant points of 7.2 to describe the memory):

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto and define myself according to and as the memory of ‘my family watching a TV program about a robbery or stealing one night some years ago, where the host chopped the kitchen knife towards the person’s head several times and the knife just got bounced back while my father said if he were in that situation he would chop towards the person’s neck – I reacted into fear imagining within my mind this whole scenario if the kitchen knife were chopped at my head or neck.’

6.4.3 Self-Forgiveness on reason for holding on to the memory:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have defined my fear of being physically harmed by knives within the memory of my family’s discussion on the TV program where the description of a kitchen knife being chopped towards a person’s head and neck was imprinted into my mind.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from fear of being physically harmed by knives through defining it within a memory within my mind, in separation of myself.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give my power away to the fear of being physically harmed by knives through separating myself from/defining myself according to and as the fear defined within the memory in separation of myself.



I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I am equal and one with the fear of being physically harmed by knives which I have created through my mind through defining myself according to this specific memory within my mind – and thus I as the creator is able to take self-responsibility for my creation, stand up within this specific fear and stop it to no longer allow myself to continue to exist as fear of being harmed physically by knives.

6.5 Self-Corrective Statements:

I accept and realize that who I am is not defined by a memory within my mind and that defining myself according to and as a memory within my mind is self-separation and self-enslavement.



I do not accept and allow myself to define myself according to and as a memory within my mind.



I do not accept and allow myself to separate and enslave myself through defining myself according to and as a memory within my mind.



I do not accept and allow myself to hold onto memories which I have used to define as who I am which is of/as the mind consciousness system.



I accept and allow myself to use/apply self-forgiveness to stop these self-definitions that I have created through memories stored within my mind – slowly but surely.





I accept and realize that the fear of being physically harmed by knives which I have created and defined as who I am within the memory within my mind in separation of myself is not who I really am as the breath of Life Here.



I accept and allow myself to stop the fear of being physically harmed by knives through stopping holding onto that specific memory within my mind.



I do not accept and allow myself to continue to exist as the fear of being physically harmed by knives.



I accept and allow myself to live who I really am as the breath of LIFE – not defined by memories within my mind, yet also not separate from ‘memories’.





I accept and realize that within separating myself from the fear of being physically harmed by knives through defining it in a memory within my mind in separation of myself, I have given my power away to the fear and abdicated self-responsibility as the creator of the fear in the first place – instead of realizing that I am equal and one with the fear because I created it and thus I as the creator is able to take self-responsibility for my creation, stand up within this specific fear and stop it to no longer allow myself to continue to exist within and as it.



I do not accept and allow myself to separate myself from fear or abdicate my self-responsibility and my power as the creator through defining fear within a memory in separation of myself – enslaving myself into and as fear through self-separation.



I accept and allow myself to take self-responsibility and power as creator – standing equal and one with fear, standing up within it and stopping it to no longer to continue to exist within and as fear.

2 comments:

  1. Awesome Wei! Would be cool to have some feedback at a later stage whether you've worked through your Phobia effectively

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you Leila for the suggestion.

    ReplyDelete