body posture

i notices a body posture that i have not realized before. this pbody osture is that my right hand tends to go up an dh i just hold it ther on my chest area -- it si like a guadrd. while my lef t hand just goes down -- not being up just dangling beside my body. What this is showing me is a pattern that i have lived out physically yet that which i have not allowed myselff to realize and be aware of. The right arm holding up is me on guard so to speak. -- protection/defend mechanism. while the left arm dangling down is me supressing mys self-expression to come through. You see that this really makes sense and this is what i have been living for quite a long itme. The suppression of self-expression and always being on guard , protecting/defeniding myself. Now i have noticed this point, i will pay attention to it and see what my body is telling me tthat i am living out. Also the body poture -- when i am sitting on the chair, i just noticed that i have been favoring myself as the structure part -- the right hand side of my body -- and i am giving less atterntion to the left side of my boduy -- the expression part. I need to restructure my world in such a way that i can assit and support myself expression.

It is interesting to see that i have beening my computer for quite a few places and still i am not finding a place yet that when i work on the computer i am able to be comfortable and everything just comes handy.

The last time i moved my computer onto my bed and yet the bed is very low so that i have to turn my body to one side. and the one side i turned to is the right and since then i have been in that physical body posture when i was working on my computer. so what i have being doing and what that body posture has been reflecting to me and the discomfort that i experienced in that body posture is taht i am suppressing my self-expression. It is an imblance between structur-e and expression -- expression has been suppressed. And when i have my back pack on my shoulder, i feel that discomfort on my left shoulder -- the back pack seems to be always wanting to slip off from my left shoulder -- and i am not giving attention to that -- and i am enduring that suffering without looking at the reason why i am experiencing that in the first place.

My room requires a complete restruction so that i am able to assist and support myself effectively -- to make sure that my human physical body posture are assisting and supporting myself within self-expression.